This is how my weekend began…

Do you know how hard it is to clean an entire gallon of green paint off a kitchen floor while there are two kids freaking out in the next room? Hopefully you don’t. And if you do, I can truly say I’m sorry. It’s no fun. Now, add on top of that a possible mild concussion from whacking your head TWICE on a cabinet door. Oh and then add in a bunch of flour being dropped on the floor by a sweet little girl who was helping me make a cake before the paint dropping fiasco.

By the time Shaun got home from work, I was so done. And I was trying so very hard to not lose myself completely. I struggle a lot with not being completely in control of my emotions. Sometimes I get really sad for no apparent reason and I hate it. It’s getting better. But last night I could feel it sneaking up on me and it really took all of my will power to fight it off.

So fast forward to this evening. I had been trying all day to get myself in a better mood, my head was still hurting, and the house was a disaster as usual. It seemed absolutely impossible to get anything done. As I was sitting in my bedroom staring at the huge pile of laundry that needed to be put away, I remembered the green paint in the kitchen. I remembered how useless it seemed when I first started cleaning it all up. And with all the other bad stuff going on, I just knew I had to keep going at it until it was done. Eventually it didn’t seem so pointless, and then after a lot more work it was done. So even though I was feeling pretty crummy, I just started putting one thing away at a time.

I found this shirt in the closet while I was cleaning and wore it to remind myself that I am awesome. The green paint might not be totally cleaned up, and there might be a bunch of toys all over the living room. But I’m feeling a whole lot better mentally, and that is all I really care about right now. I’m not a very good mama and wife when I’m feeling crazy. Tonight I’ll finish up the laundry, and then tomorrow I’ll worry about the rest of the house. One thing at a time.

And if you are wondering. We made this strawberry rhubarb coffee cake and it was amazing.